Grief and substance use, each painful on their own, can sometimes weave together in ways that feel confusing, overwhelming, and isolating. For those experiencing this intersection, it is important to know: no one has to walk through it alone.

At Crossroads Counseling, every grief counselor offers care guided by empathy, warmth, and individualized support. Grief is not only about the loss of a loved one; it can also be about relationships, identity, or purpose. Substances may become a way to soften that pain or simply to get through the days.

Why Grief and SUD Often Go Hand in Hand

The connection between grief and substance use is not unusual. Loss can feel like the ground has shifted, and substances such as alcohol, prescription medication, or other drugs may provide temporary relief. Yet over time, that reliance can deepen the very pain it was meant to soothe.

Many individuals describe the realization that substance use was less about recreation and more about coping with sorrow:

“I thought I was just drinking to sleep, but now I realize I was trying to dull the ache of missing them.”

This overlap highlights how grief and substance use disorder (SUD) often move in tandem, each amplifying the other’s weight.

The Biology of Grief and Substance Use

Grief does not only affect emotions; it affects the entire body. The nervous system often stays in a heightened state of alert, which can create restlessness, fatigue, and difficulty concentrating. Sleep is disrupted as the brain struggles to process loss, and the immune system can weaken under the strain of prolonged stress.

Substances may feel like a quick fix for these physiological shifts. Alcohol, prescription medication, or other drugs can temporarily quiet the nervous system, ease sleep, or dull pain. But over time, they disrupt natural healing processes with symptoms like worsening mood, fragmenting rest, and placing additional strain on the body. What begins as a short-term coping strategy can create long-term consequences for both physical and mental health.

Seeing Real Life: A Case in Point

Consider the story of “A,” who lost a beloved parent not long ago. Alcohol initially felt like a way to numb the nights… until nights blurred into dependency. In therapy, a pivotal question reframed the journey: “When you pour that drink, what are you hoping it will do at this moment?”

That kind of honest exploration revealed that the goal was not escape, but safety. From there, healing began with healthier anchors: grief rituals, breath work, creative remembrance, meaningful connection, and eventually, freedom from the substance that had felt like both shield and chain.

The Double Stigma

For many, grief and substance use carry a heavy weight of judgment. Society often expects grief to follow a neat timeline; “moving on” within months or appearing “strong” in public. At the same time, substance use is surrounded by stigma, with assumptions of weakness or lack of willpower.

When these two experiences intersect, shame can multiply. Individuals may feel they cannot talk openly about their grief or their reliance on substances, leaving them isolated at the very moment they most need support. Breaking through this double stigma requires compassion, honesty, and safe spaces where pain can be voiced without fear of judgment.

How We Approach It at Crossroads Counseling

At Crossroads Counseling, grief and substance use are addressed together with compassion and intentionality. Healing isn’t about control or suppression; it’s about making space for the real emotions underneath and finding healthier ways forward.

Exploring the Shape of Grief

Grief does not always show up as sadness. For some, it appears as regret, numbness, guilt, or even anger. Naming and exploring these emotions gives language to what is often overwhelming or left unspoken.

Addressing the Underlying Ache

Substance use is often a response to pain rather than the root issue itself. By tending to the deeper emotional ache, rather than focusing only on the behavior, healing becomes more authentic and meaningful.

Building New Coping Tools

Grounding exercises, grief rituals, restorative routines, and supportive connections all help create resilience. These tools provide relief that lasts longer than the temporary escape substances can offer.

Preventing Relapse with Compassion

Healing also includes planning for difficult days. Relapse-prevention strategies at Crossroads Counseling include emotional check-ins, meaningful rituals, and ongoing support, so grief feels held rather than ignored or medicated.

A Commitment to Compassion

Above all, the process is grounded in compassion and respect. Every person deserves a safe, non-judgmental space where honesty is welcomed and healing is possible.

A Space for Reflection

Healing from grief and substance use may feel contradictory; grief longs to feel, while substances numb. Yet therapy creates space to hold both truths at once. As one reflection often suggests: healing begins when grief and substance use are no longer working against each other, but are understood with compassion and care.

Healthy Alternatives for Coping

While substances may seem like the easiest option, there are healthier ways to navigate the waves of grief. Practices such as journaling, creative expression through art or music, or movement like yoga and walking can provide outlets for overwhelming emotions. Support groups, whether focused on grief, recovery, or both, offer connection with others who understand. For many, spiritual or mindfulness practices also create grounding and a sense of peace.

These alternatives do not erase grief but instead help individuals process it with intention. Over time, they build resilience and provide moments of relief that are restorative, rather than numbing.

You’re Not Broken: You’re Healing

It takes courage to face grief and substance use together. The goal is not to erase pain or pretend it never existed, but to invite healing that honors both what was lost and who a person is becoming.

At Crossroads Counseling, clients are met with compassion, collaboration, and human connection. Working with a dedicated grief counselor can provide the guidance and safe space needed to move through loss without relying on substances. For anyone beginning to notice the link between grief and substance use, or already taking steps toward change,there is support available every step of the way.

Learn more about how Crossroads can help.

Sources

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“The Impact of Stigma on Family and Friends Bereaved by a Drug Overdose Death.” ResearchGate, www.researchgate.net/publication/363883244_The_Impact_of_Stigma_on_Family_and_Friends_Bereaved_by_a_Drug_Overdose_Death. 

“Grief Is an Emotion.” Speaking Grief, speakinggrief.org/get-better-at-grief/understanding-grief/grief-emotion. Accessed 24 Sept. 2025.

Nelson, K., J. Lukawiecki, K. Waitschies, E. Jackson, and C. Zivot. “Exploring the Impacts of an Art and Narrative Therapy Program on Participants’ Grief and Bereavement Experiences.” Omega (Westport), vol. 90, no. 2, Dec. 2024, pp. 726–745. doi:10.1177/00302228221111726.